Bedside Manners/Transcript
Clarence: hisses Behold! And now, through the power of cryogenic technology, we will bring this mummy back to life! Grunting Miss Baker: Okay, that's your time, Clarence. Clarence: Oh, also I have some announcements. So, as you all know, Belson is in the hospital. - Did you know that? - Clarence: Come on, guys. He broke 27 bones. He's barely alive! We found Belson on my lawn last night. A car hit his bike and busted all his bones, and an ambulance had to come and take him to the hospital. So I'm organizing a trip to go see him after school. But don't bring any food, 'cause I'm getting a eight-foot party sub for everybody. So here's the sign-up sheet. There's room for a few more people in my mom's car, depending on where you sit and how big you are. So just come sign up right now, and, uh all right, everybody's got rides. I'll see you there. Miss Baker: Wait! Clarence, class isn't over yet! bell rings cheer Clarence: Oh, that's mom. You guys ready to go? Jeff: We'll meet you there, - so we can get Belson a card. Sumo: And, uh, unicorn balloons. Clarence: Great idea! He'll love those! Mary: All right, whose hat did you steal this time? Sumo: Now I kind of do wanna go so I can give Belson girl balloons. Jeff: So we're going? Sumo: What are you, nuts? Song: Lettuce, tomato, cheese party sub Clarence: Need anything? Mayo? Oil? Mary: Clarence, did you unwrap that sandwich? It's getting all over everything! Come on. Clarence: gasps Don't listen to her, subsy! enters the hospital Humming bell dings Belson's floor, please. Squish! Squish! Hmm. Elevator's broke. I guess we better wait for the elevator doctor to fix it! bell dings Oof! Crashing smack! Woman: Welcome to Aberdale General. How may I help you? Clarence: I'm looking for my Belson. He's short, he's got a eyebrow, and he's angry. Grrr! Like this! He's tough to love, but worth the effort. Woman: Oh, that's sweet. Clarence: gasps In Belson's Room TV: "Dogwalkers: Miami!" TV Woman: I thought it was gonna be really hard, but it's not that hard. You just have to make sure none of the dogs bite each other, or else you'll get sued. When they told me I had to walk three dogs, I thought I'd flip. Grunting barks chuckles get's in Belson's room squeaking Belson: Hey! Hey! Hey! Thud Hey! That's a body! Help! Splat! Help! Body in my room! There's a body in here! Help! Body! Help! Help! Clarence: Yep! And this body is ready to party! Sub. Get it? 'Cause of party? 'Cause it's a party and a sub Aah! Groans Belson, are you there? Belson? Did they cast up your earholes? Scoop, scoop, scoop, scoop, scoop. Belson: What are you doing? Clarence: I'm brightening up your day, duh! - Ow! - Aah! My eyes! Clarence: Hmm, we're gonna need to make some room in here. Belson: Room for what? Clarence: For all of the people that are gonna come to see you! Belson: I don't want anybody in here. Especially you. Clarence: You and I can't eat this party sub alone. We're gonna need some party favors. ringing Jeff: Hello. Clarence: Hey, Jeff. Are you and Sumo all ready to go to the hospital yet? Jeff: Uh, not yet. Clarence: Great. Can you stop and pick up some streamers, horns, twinkle lights, strobe lights, a fog machine, glitter, board games, a swing set, ping-pong table, a hot dog table Jeff: No, I'm afraid we can't because... Sumo: Tell him we're not coming! Jeff: Sumo wants to talk to you. Sumo: What?! You tell him! Jeff: I'm not gonna tell him, you tell him Clarence: Okay, but don't take too long, guys. Belson needs our support in his time of need. He's very fragile. Belson: No, I'm not! Jeff: We'll be there soon. Sumo: What?! What was that? Jeff: We have to go, Sumo. Jeff: It's the right thing to do. Gasps sighs Sumo: Let's go. Clarence: They'll be here any minute. So, how lucky is it that you got run over right outside my house? Belson: Not lucky at all. I got run over. Clarence: All done! You look so handsome, like Jackie Chan! Belson: Oh, no. Clarence: What's the matter? Are you not comfy, buddy? Belson: I'm in serious pain, thanks to your slippery roof! Clarence: My roof? I thought you got hit by a car. Wait, was there a car on my roof? Belson: Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. I need the nurse. Clarence: Forget nurses! You got me! I'll help you out! Here, I'll make your bag of medicine go faster. Belson: Grunting No! No, no! That's not even hooked up! Clarence: Let's move you by the window. But first? Doughnuts! Belson: Stop! No! Aah! Oh, no! Clarence: Let's get something good on the TV. Belches Click Jeff: Ow! Ow! Sumo: What's wrong? Jeff: Hospitals are hotbeds of disease. Cholera, dropsy, scurvy Who knows what we'll be exposed to! Let's get directions to Belson's room, say hi, and leave. Sumo: Directions? Bah! Eh, I know where we're going. lips, slurping Jeff: gasps Sumo: Come on! Belson: Finally! I'm starving! Clarence: Oh, no. They forgot the salt! Here, let me take care of that for you. Aah! Oh, hey, look, it's a party sub! Oh, Belson, if I weren't here to take care of you, where would you be? Belson:Nurse! Nurse! Nurse: Is everything okay in here? Belson: It will be after he's gone! Nurse: All right, come on. Clarence: Who, me? Okay. I love you Belson: Ahh, finally. Jeff: Why don't we just ask someone? Sumo: 'Cause I know where we are! Jeff: So why are we walking down this hallway for the third time? Sumo: 'Cause it's my favorite hallway! Jeff: I'm asking for help. Sumo: Waste of time. Jeff: Excuse me. Excuse - Excuse me! Stop! Nurse: Well, what is it? Hurry up. I'm in the middle of something. Jeff: I, uh, was looking for my friend Belson. Nurse:Belson who? We got a lot of Belsons. Tch-tch-tch. Belson. Arturo Belson. Nelson Belson. Can you imagine having that name? You got a last name? Jeff: Uh, N-Noles. Belson Noles. Nurse: Oh, here he is. Take the elevator to four, go right, left, down the steps, through the quad, left, left and, uh, you're there. Jeff: Oh, okay. Thank you. Nurse: No problem. Jeff: Wait, you forgot the Aah! dream clicks Belson: Another perfect day in paradise, Bodhi. I may even smile. Clarence: Hey, Belson! I'm gonna try out my blow hole now. Belson: Grunting No, no, no, no! Clarence: Morning, Belson. Hold on, the water pillow's leaking all over the place. Belson: Who let you in here again? Clarence: Oh, I got my tricks. Nurse: Oh, that's nice. bell dings Jeff: I think he said floor 10. Then we Coughs Jeff: get off Coughs Jeff: and take a left Coughs steadily rumbles Jeff: What was that? Sumo: I don't know. Elevator's stuck. steadily Belson: Great party. Clarence: Uhh, yeah. Isn't this party a blast? Heh. Everybody's here! Hey, Jeff. Jeff Hi. I'm Jeff. Um, I'm afraid of dirt. Lookin' sharp, Sumo! Sumo Agrr. You ain't so bad yourself! Chelsea, is that, um, new hair? Chelsea Oh, thank you. I just grew it! Sumo Agrr. I wish I had hair. Giggles That's okay, Sumo. At least you're not a clumsy bag of bones like Belson here. Belson: I'm not clumsy. Your skylight was broken. Clarence: Skylight? What do you mean, skylight? Belson, is there something you're not telling me? Belson: Umm, isn't this supposed to be a party? Clarence: Yes, it is. Party! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Party! steadily Jeff: Sumo, get us out of here. Sumo: Oh, all right. Here's the problem. Oh! Oh, maybe not. continues Clarence: Come on, everybody! Let's sing one more song! Belson: Ohh! Shut up! Stop it! Be quiet! Just be quiet! I didn't get hit by a car. I was pranking you. It was me, Dustin, and Nathan. I was gonna change your TV channels through the skylight. I had to buy a remote on Clickers.wiz 'cause your TV is so old. TV: And now back to "Hearts & Hydrants: extinguishing the flames of love. Belson: But your loser skylight broke and made me slide off your loser roof! Clarence: What? Belson: Oh! Aah! Groans Clarence: He was so young! Clarence: I don't get it. How is that a prank? Belson: Because I was gonna change the channel and you were gonna miss the end of your show. Clarence: And that's what you consider a prank? Belson: Yeah, an awesome prank. Clarence: Hmm. So if I take your spoon, is that a prank? Belson: No. That's not a prank. Clarence: Can water be a prank? Belson: Uh, well, sure, I guess. Aah! - W-What're you doing? Clarence: Pranking you! Belson: No, no, no, no! Wait, wait, wait! No! No, no, no, no, no, no! Ow! No, no, no, no! Crash! - Ow. Ow. Clarence: And they said that I could have my own room, but I said, "no, thank you. I'll bunk with my old pal Belson until my head crack is better. Banging Belson: What's that banging? Clarence: Probably a woodpecker. Or maybe a metal-pecker. Or a light-pecker? Or floor-pecker? Groans Or what about a pepper-pecker? The pepper-pecker! Belson, it's the pepper pecker! It's just peckin' all the peppers that there are! Jeff: grunting heavily Whew. Coughs barks Category:Transcripts